Home for the Holidays

Audio Version

In this article “home for the holidays” refers to coming home to ourselves so that we don’t give away our power as we engage with family, friends, and our conditioned experiences of the holidays. It is encouragement to be empowered in how we experience this holiday season, fully at choice and fully grounded in ourselves.

Coming home to ourselves is recognizing that what we experience and what comes up for us are not about anything “out there,” but it is about what is going on with us, within ourselves. This is true of both pleasant emotions, like joy, and any unpleasant emotions. It is the state of our inner world, including triggers (unhealed places within us) as well as our sense of wholeness and well-being, that create our experience.

The holidays, particularly Christmas with its idyllic vision of life, can really trigger in us any sense of being inadequate, less than whole, or falling short of our ideals. It can also bring up grief as our holiday may not include people we have shared the holidays with in the past.

My own experience with Christmas has been quite difficult at times, especially the last couple years. As I have looked deeply into myself I have found that I don’t relate to the ways the holiday is commonly celebrated, and that I am no longer capable of pretending that I do. This is beginning to free me to just say no to the things that aren’t aligned for me. Rather than trying to make everything okay by just adjusting the outward experience, I am paying attention to what is going on with me, what I am needing during this time of year.

This is bringing me home to myself. With that focus, it is less important to me what I do or don’t do because I am clear where I am, taking care of what I need, and ultimately at peace with myself.

Eight Tips for Staying Grounded this Holiday Season

1. Make sure that you are breathing fully. During times of busyness, stress, or anxiety, our breath often becomes shallower. Breathing fully keeps us grounded and in the flow of life.
2. Stay aware of how you’re feeling in your third chakra energy center (the area around your solar plexus, just above the navel). If you keep yourself centered there, you’re more likely to feel empowered in your authentic self.
3. Remember that whatever your experience, it is perfect for you, and let others’ experiences be perfect for them. Steer away from any tendency to think anything “should” be different.
4. When around people who see the world very differently than you do, try to maintain a sense of curiosity and let go of any need to prove your view. You might even respond with “That’s an interesting perspective.”
5. Give yourself permission to take a time-out if you need one. Perhaps, spend a few minutes in another room or take a short walk outside.
6. Find ways to move your body so that whatever emotions you’re feeling move through you rather than getting stuck.
7. If possible, have someone you can call or text who will remind you of your wholeness if you feel yourself contracting.
8. Develop a set of positive affirmations in advance that you can read to bring your attention back to a more positive view of yourself if you begin to get down.

Enjoy the journey.