Living with Nothing to Prove

A landscape of yellow field and blue sky

by Gregory Toole

Louise Hay said in her book, You Can Heal Your Life, “The innermost belief for everyone I have worked with is always ‘I’m not good enough.’” Given the large number of people she has worked with, it could benefit us all to pay attention to how that core hidden belief might be operating in us.

If most of us have accepted on some deeper unconscious level that we’re not good enough, then on some level everyone’s trying to prove that they ARE good enough. If we look out into our world we can see that going on everywhere. Oh, and of course, if we look honestly at ourselves we can see it too. In so many spheres, it shows up as a fervent desire to prove oneself right and others wrong, leading to wars and dysfunctional political systems, as well as less than satisfying personal relationships.

Until we become conscious of this hidden belief that is part of the collective human unconsciousness, then we are caught in the trap of constantly trying to prove ourselves. What would life be like if you had nothing to prove, if you fully accepted who you are, how much you do, and what you have?

Before you say, “No, I don’t have a belief that I’m not good enough,” ask yourself whether you find yourself not having enough time, money, or love, or just can’t seem to do enough? These outward experiences of ‘not enough’ are manifestations of the inner belief of not being enough.

For me personally, whenever I am off kilter, I can almost always trace it back to slipping into a feeling of not being enough. The good news is, by reminding myself that I am enough, I am powerfully transported back to centeredness and peace.

When we are driven by the need to prove that we are enough it colors how we show up in the world. In this state, we are unable to be authentically who we are because ‘who we are’ is not enough. So we must layer on top of who we are all the things that we feel will make us enough.

If so many are experiencing a sense of not being good enough, and living to some extent from that place, then we are rarely meeting and experiencing each other authentically. We are experiencing ourselves and each other as the projections of ourselves with all the things layered on top that we feel make us worthy and acceptable.

It’s not true that we’re not good enough. We are the divine in expression. How could we be anything but perfect as we are?

When we live from the sense of being good enough as we are, authentic, real, and vulnerable, then we have the true possibility of experiencing a sense of ‘enough’ in our outer experiences – enough time, money, and friends. More importantly, we experience the time, money, and friends we have with greater fulfillment, joy, and peace, rather than anxiously feeling there’s something more we need to have or should be doing.

In looking more deeply into ourselves to see where we might be trying to prove ourselves, the opportunity is to free ourselves from this unconscious limitation, and to affirm to ourselves, “I am enough. I do enough. I have enough.” Remembering that truth can also remind us to put our attention on the place within us, at our center, where we experience the peace that passes human understanding, the joy and love of just being.

We deserve this – to know we are good, worthy, deserving of happiness, and that we have nothing to prove.

Enjoy the journey.

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